As retirement approaches and the reality of ageing sets in, many single women wonder what growing old without a partner may look like. Beyond the joy of living life on their own terms, single women face real questions about companionship, financial security, healthcare and who will be there in their later years.
According to the Singapore Department of Statistics, as of 2024, 19.6 per cent of Singapore women (both citizens and permanent residents) aged 35 to 39, 14.7 per cent of those aged 40 to 44, and 14.6 per cent of those aged 45 to 49, are unmarried.
For some, staying single is a conscious decision; for others, it’s that the right partner never showed up.
CNA Women spoke to five women who found themselves single at different stages of life, who are charting their own paths towards ageing well.
From health and financial planning to retirement and building social support networks, they share how they are preparing to navigate their later years with independence and purpose.
ANNIE TAN, 67, PART-TIME ADMINISTRATOR
For the past 40 years, I’ve been more focused on building my career and taking care of my family. Though I have dated and been in relationships, I did not meet one who’s right enough to be married to.
Singapore women say being single is far from lonesome. (Photo: iStock/tkpond)
Being single at my age is far from lonesome. I keep myself busy from Monday to Sunday. I work, exercise, go out with friends as well as spend time with family.
Perhaps it’s my outgoing personality, which is why I have many friends – from mahjong and Zumba kakis, walking buddies, to ex-colleagues, as well as friends who live abroad, whom I catch up with regularly.
But I’m not saying that I don’t experience loneliness in my singlehood. Those moments, however, are rare and fleeting. I will quickly fill those times with chores, hobbies, anything to occupy myself with.
Yet the reality of growing old alone remains. What scares me the most is growing old and being sick. I don’t wish to burden or inconvenience my family (namely, my two brothers, nephew and two nieces whom I am very close to) or even my close friends.
This is why I plan to stay healthy through regular health screenings, taking medications faithfully, watching my diet, and staying active by stretching, going for long walks, practising qigong, and Zumba.
Besides physical health, I also consider mental and emotional well-being where I volunteer at the Buddhist temple as a way for me to give back to society.
Some single women fear getting sick in old age and becoming a burden to family. (Photo: iStock/Perawit Boonchu)
As for my retirement plan, I started building my financial plans when I was working full-time – from small investment plans to housing and CPF savings to take care of my twilight years.
If I cannot walk one day, I will send myself to a nursing home. But my wish is to stay in a retirement village to enjoy my final chapter there.
SHERYL KHONG, 51, HEAD OF HUMAN RESOURCES
Being single is empowering as my identity is my own without being tied to being a Mrs So-and-So, or little Miss X’s mother.
I don’t have the stress of balancing tight family schedules, household expenses or running endless errands but being single also means that I miss out on the rich experience of having children and building a family.
Growing up in a matriarchal family, the women who have been my role models were fearless and independent and didn’t seem to slow down socially even in their 80s.
So, apart from feeling helpless in a medical emergency (if there are no bystanders nearby to help), I don’t have fears about growing old as a single person.
Having a long-term financial plan is crucial, whether it is investments or savings. (Photo: iStock/Luke Chan)
Aside from taking a career break, I don’t fully buy into the concept of retirement. My own mother still works at 75 years old; she is still sprightly and young at heart.
But having a long-term financial plan is important for everyone, regardless of age and marital status, and mine includes investing in equities. As a single woman, I find this skill set to be critical and I wish more women took the time and interest to learn about such investments.
Besides taking care of my finances, I’m quite assured that if I need help in my twilight years, there are many healthcare support systems in place in Singapore and with the right insurance, I will have access to a paid caregiver or be placed in a care facility.
Right now, preventative measures are important – eating nutrient-dense meals, doing strength training, and getting cardiovascular exercise, all these will help me age well.
To age well is also to live well and that to me means being socially engaged and having meaningful relationships that are life-giving. By this, I keep in close contact with my large family, which includes siblings, my many cousins and their children, as well as friends whom I meet regularly, no matter how busy or how far away they live.
I am very blessed to have close friends in their 30s, 40s, 50s whom I can count on and who form my social network. I make it a point to follow up with them often, whether in person or over the phone.
Another area that I feel is equally important is staying connected to my faith and community, as I embark on this new chapter of my life.
NELLIE TAN, 59, PRIVATE GUARDIAN
I’ve been single for more than 12 years. So far, I’m very comfortable being on my own, enjoying my own company and freedom.
Besides having a very close-knit family that includes my sisters, nieces and nephew, I have an active social circle where I meet various groups of friends regularly for a meal.
What’s important for singles is to have a group of very good friends you can count on. They are probably a big part of why I’m not anxious enough to go searching for a partner.
It's important for singles is to have a group of good friends they can count on. (Photo: iStock/South_agency)
For seven years, I lived in Guildford, Surrey, with my ward, who came to the United Kingdom (UK) as a student. She was under 18 at that time and needed a legal guardian. As I am single and able to help, her mother – my best friend – asked me to step in.
Now that she is in university, I have moved back to Singapore.
I’ve been planning for my retirement for a long time, with some good financial investments set aside.
Although I have yet to make any concrete plans, I’ve considered booking myself into a private nursing home with good facilities when the time comes for it. Another option would be to engage a helper with nursing experience but that would be a last resort.
My only fears of growing old are falling, losing mobility, and insomnia. This is why I have started to do Pilates and work out with a personal trainer twice a week, and I know I’m on the right track, seeing huge improvements in my physical health.
Keeping my body fit by walking 10,000 steps a day, meeting up with people, doing sports, going on holidays and learning a new skill like Chinese calligraphy are what I do to live well.
GRACE SIM, 45, CIVIL SERVANT
“I choose not to be married because I’ve seen how fragile marriages can be. But I’ll admit that at times, it can feel isolating not having a partner to share the day-to-day experiences with.
Ageing well means staying active and mobile well into old age. (Photo: iStock/PuiStocker65)
What scares me most about ageing and being single is the possibility of dying alone without anyone knowing. I’ve read news articles about elderly individuals in Singapore who passed away in their flats, only to be discovered days later because of the smell of decomposition.
That image haunts me, because it highlights how invisible ageing singles can sometimes become. While I enjoy the independence of being single now, I do fear the loneliness and vulnerability that might come with old age.
I made sure that important matters like my Lasting Power of Attorney, care planning, and will are properly in place.
Financially, besides setting aside money every month, I have also started topping up my CPF Special Account. I am using My Legacy, a government initiative that provides everything you need to know for end-of-life planning and even post-death administrative matters, as a guide for what needs to be done.
However, I don’t believe in working myself to death, so I’m considering taking a step back from full-time work once I reach around 52, to allow more balance and time for the things I value.
Meanwhile, I’m planning on staying active and mobile, hopefully until 90. I am very inspired by my elderly neighbours who walk to the market every morning for breakfast.
In the evening at about 5:30pm, this uncle in his 80s will sit at the park and wait for his friend to join him there. They are not super active yet still maintain a healthy social life.
DAWN SOH, 47, MARKETING CONSULTANT
I’ve been single since 2018. I think Cupid must have missed me a few times and I’m still waiting for the right match.
Eating more nutrient-dense foods, and cutting back on processed foods and alcohol helps you maintain your health as you grow older. (Photo: iStock/Andrii Zastrozhnov)
I think ageing well is about being prepared. Financial planning is key if I want to enjoy freedom later on without having to worry too much. I started building financial independence in my 20s, where I put most of my savings into buying the HDB flat I’m living in now.
But eventually I will need to downsize and stay in a smaller, two-room Flexi Flat and get some extra cash from it. The rest of my savings plans are mostly endowment and insurance-savings plans.
Ageing well also means taking care of my health, staying active and being mobile. I have started to be more conscious of my diet, eating less processed food and cutting down on alcohol consumption.
I work out at least three times a week with a mix of cardio and strength training – I still want to be able to carry my own scuba tanks when I go diving in my old age.
Having seen how my mum’s mobility deteriorated in her 70s, I incorporate Pilates and stretching to help me stay agile.
I often joke with my single female friends that one day we might all end up living in the same neighbourhood or even in the same retirement home – hopefully still mobile enough to manage most of the chores ourselves.
What truly matters to me is being surrounded by meaningful connections and positivity. I believe the right people, whether friends or family, will always remain part of the journey. With or without a partner, I want my retirement years to be fulfilling — and above all, free.
CNA Women is a section on CNA Lifestyle that seeks to inform, empower and inspire the modern woman. If you have women-related news, issues and ideas to share with us, email CNAWomen [at] mediacorp.com.sg (CNAWomen[at]mediacorp[dot]com[dot]sg).
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According to the Singapore Department of Statistics, as of 2024, 19.6 per cent of Singapore women (both citizens and permanent residents) aged 35 to 39, 14.7 per cent of those aged 40 to 44, and 14.6 per cent of those aged 45 to 49, are unmarried.
For some, staying single is a conscious decision; for others, it’s that the right partner never showed up.
CNA Women spoke to five women who found themselves single at different stages of life, who are charting their own paths towards ageing well.
From health and financial planning to retirement and building social support networks, they share how they are preparing to navigate their later years with independence and purpose.
"BEING SINGLE AT MY AGE IS FAR FROM LONESOME"
ANNIE TAN, 67, PART-TIME ADMINISTRATOR
For the past 40 years, I’ve been more focused on building my career and taking care of my family. Though I have dated and been in relationships, I did not meet one who’s right enough to be married to.
Singapore women say being single is far from lonesome. (Photo: iStock/tkpond)
Being single at my age is far from lonesome. I keep myself busy from Monday to Sunday. I work, exercise, go out with friends as well as spend time with family.
Perhaps it’s my outgoing personality, which is why I have many friends – from mahjong and Zumba kakis, walking buddies, to ex-colleagues, as well as friends who live abroad, whom I catch up with regularly.
But I’m not saying that I don’t experience loneliness in my singlehood. Those moments, however, are rare and fleeting. I will quickly fill those times with chores, hobbies, anything to occupy myself with.
Yet the reality of growing old alone remains. What scares me the most is growing old and being sick. I don’t wish to burden or inconvenience my family (namely, my two brothers, nephew and two nieces whom I am very close to) or even my close friends.
This is why I plan to stay healthy through regular health screenings, taking medications faithfully, watching my diet, and staying active by stretching, going for long walks, practising qigong, and Zumba.
Besides physical health, I also consider mental and emotional well-being where I volunteer at the Buddhist temple as a way for me to give back to society.
Some single women fear getting sick in old age and becoming a burden to family. (Photo: iStock/Perawit Boonchu)
As for my retirement plan, I started building my financial plans when I was working full-time – from small investment plans to housing and CPF savings to take care of my twilight years.
If I cannot walk one day, I will send myself to a nursing home. But my wish is to stay in a retirement village to enjoy my final chapter there.
"I DON’T FULLY BUY INTO THE CONCEPT OF RETIREMENT"
SHERYL KHONG, 51, HEAD OF HUMAN RESOURCES
Being single is empowering as my identity is my own without being tied to being a Mrs So-and-So, or little Miss X’s mother.
I don’t have the stress of balancing tight family schedules, household expenses or running endless errands but being single also means that I miss out on the rich experience of having children and building a family.
Growing up in a matriarchal family, the women who have been my role models were fearless and independent and didn’t seem to slow down socially even in their 80s.
So, apart from feeling helpless in a medical emergency (if there are no bystanders nearby to help), I don’t have fears about growing old as a single person.
Having a long-term financial plan is crucial, whether it is investments or savings. (Photo: iStock/Luke Chan)
Aside from taking a career break, I don’t fully buy into the concept of retirement. My own mother still works at 75 years old; she is still sprightly and young at heart.
But having a long-term financial plan is important for everyone, regardless of age and marital status, and mine includes investing in equities. As a single woman, I find this skill set to be critical and I wish more women took the time and interest to learn about such investments.
Besides taking care of my finances, I’m quite assured that if I need help in my twilight years, there are many healthcare support systems in place in Singapore and with the right insurance, I will have access to a paid caregiver or be placed in a care facility.
Right now, preventative measures are important – eating nutrient-dense meals, doing strength training, and getting cardiovascular exercise, all these will help me age well.
To age well is also to live well and that to me means being socially engaged and having meaningful relationships that are life-giving. By this, I keep in close contact with my large family, which includes siblings, my many cousins and their children, as well as friends whom I meet regularly, no matter how busy or how far away they live.
I am very blessed to have close friends in their 30s, 40s, 50s whom I can count on and who form my social network. I make it a point to follow up with them often, whether in person or over the phone.
Another area that I feel is equally important is staying connected to my faith and community, as I embark on this new chapter of my life.
"I’VE CONSIDERED BOOKING MYSELF INTO A PRIVATE NURSING HOME"
NELLIE TAN, 59, PRIVATE GUARDIAN
I’ve been single for more than 12 years. So far, I’m very comfortable being on my own, enjoying my own company and freedom.
Besides having a very close-knit family that includes my sisters, nieces and nephew, I have an active social circle where I meet various groups of friends regularly for a meal.
What’s important for singles is to have a group of very good friends you can count on. They are probably a big part of why I’m not anxious enough to go searching for a partner.
It's important for singles is to have a group of good friends they can count on. (Photo: iStock/South_agency)
For seven years, I lived in Guildford, Surrey, with my ward, who came to the United Kingdom (UK) as a student. She was under 18 at that time and needed a legal guardian. As I am single and able to help, her mother – my best friend – asked me to step in.
Now that she is in university, I have moved back to Singapore.
I’ve been planning for my retirement for a long time, with some good financial investments set aside.
Although I have yet to make any concrete plans, I’ve considered booking myself into a private nursing home with good facilities when the time comes for it. Another option would be to engage a helper with nursing experience but that would be a last resort.
My only fears of growing old are falling, losing mobility, and insomnia. This is why I have started to do Pilates and work out with a personal trainer twice a week, and I know I’m on the right track, seeing huge improvements in my physical health.
Keeping my body fit by walking 10,000 steps a day, meeting up with people, doing sports, going on holidays and learning a new skill like Chinese calligraphy are what I do to live well.
"WHAT SCARES ME MOST IS DYING ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE KNOWING"
GRACE SIM, 45, CIVIL SERVANT
“I choose not to be married because I’ve seen how fragile marriages can be. But I’ll admit that at times, it can feel isolating not having a partner to share the day-to-day experiences with.
Ageing well means staying active and mobile well into old age. (Photo: iStock/PuiStocker65)
What scares me most about ageing and being single is the possibility of dying alone without anyone knowing. I’ve read news articles about elderly individuals in Singapore who passed away in their flats, only to be discovered days later because of the smell of decomposition.
That image haunts me, because it highlights how invisible ageing singles can sometimes become. While I enjoy the independence of being single now, I do fear the loneliness and vulnerability that might come with old age.
I made sure that important matters like my Lasting Power of Attorney, care planning, and will are properly in place.
Financially, besides setting aside money every month, I have also started topping up my CPF Special Account. I am using My Legacy, a government initiative that provides everything you need to know for end-of-life planning and even post-death administrative matters, as a guide for what needs to be done.
However, I don’t believe in working myself to death, so I’m considering taking a step back from full-time work once I reach around 52, to allow more balance and time for the things I value.
Meanwhile, I’m planning on staying active and mobile, hopefully until 90. I am very inspired by my elderly neighbours who walk to the market every morning for breakfast.
In the evening at about 5:30pm, this uncle in his 80s will sit at the park and wait for his friend to join him there. They are not super active yet still maintain a healthy social life.
"I STILL WANT TO BE ABLE TO CARRY MY OWN SCUBA TANKS IN OLD AGE"
DAWN SOH, 47, MARKETING CONSULTANT
I’ve been single since 2018. I think Cupid must have missed me a few times and I’m still waiting for the right match.
Eating more nutrient-dense foods, and cutting back on processed foods and alcohol helps you maintain your health as you grow older. (Photo: iStock/Andrii Zastrozhnov)
I think ageing well is about being prepared. Financial planning is key if I want to enjoy freedom later on without having to worry too much. I started building financial independence in my 20s, where I put most of my savings into buying the HDB flat I’m living in now.
But eventually I will need to downsize and stay in a smaller, two-room Flexi Flat and get some extra cash from it. The rest of my savings plans are mostly endowment and insurance-savings plans.
Ageing well also means taking care of my health, staying active and being mobile. I have started to be more conscious of my diet, eating less processed food and cutting down on alcohol consumption.
I work out at least three times a week with a mix of cardio and strength training – I still want to be able to carry my own scuba tanks when I go diving in my old age.
Having seen how my mum’s mobility deteriorated in her 70s, I incorporate Pilates and stretching to help me stay agile.
I often joke with my single female friends that one day we might all end up living in the same neighbourhood or even in the same retirement home – hopefully still mobile enough to manage most of the chores ourselves.
What truly matters to me is being surrounded by meaningful connections and positivity. I believe the right people, whether friends or family, will always remain part of the journey. With or without a partner, I want my retirement years to be fulfilling — and above all, free.
CNA Women is a section on CNA Lifestyle that seeks to inform, empower and inspire the modern woman. If you have women-related news, issues and ideas to share with us, email CNAWomen [at] mediacorp.com.sg (CNAWomen[at]mediacorp[dot]com[dot]sg).
Continue reading...